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Marie Abell

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since Mar 13, 2021
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homeschooling goat kids dog duck foraging rabbit medical herbs
Earthbound misfit.
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Recent posts by Marie Abell

Please disregard my earlier post...I never heard of microdosing until just now. Google answered my question. Now I understand the significance of this post and I shall maintain silence.
1 day ago
So are they speaking only of a trial done with psilocybin pills? As in a lab-produced chemical extract? I would love to see some info on how this might be done in a more natural setting, i.e. super small doses of actual mushrooms or possibly a tincture. For those of us living in the farther reaches of the globe this is the type of thing that would be more accessible and of course sustainable. And anyways I am always suspicious of removing a single component and using it separately from the other elements that nature combined it with.

Thanks for sharing this article! Exciting information.
1 day ago
What time is it when an elephant sits on a fence?

Time to get a new fence.
5 days ago

r ranson wrote:This might help with the why.

Thanks, r. That thread is a good read and confirms what I suspected to be the reasoning behind the policy. And again, I do agree with the decision--it just makes sense.
I wrote a post the other day, I thought it was pretty great. In fact, it made my personal record for most apples earned on a single post (4). Somebody even gave me pie for that post! Then, this morning I got an email from girbot advising me that I needed to remove my reference to a certain herb. Well gee. I was a bit miffed for all of 30 seconds, but I quickly made the edit and now my post is back up for the world to see in all its' pithy glory.

Sometimes it's hard to remember that cultural and legal norms can villify or heroize seemingly innocuous things. Especially when said things are illegal in some places but perfectly legal in others! Truthfully after just a bit of consideration it's easy to see how the mention of this type of subject could derail or discolor an otherwise cleanly productive conversation.

For a while, I prohibited bananas in my house. I didn't buy them, eat them, or allow other people to bring them into my house. Do I think bananas are bad? Not really. Do I think that all people everywhere should instate a banana ban in their houses just like me? Nope. But my kids got sick if they ate bananas and they were too little to understand seeing something yummy and not being allowed to eat it. I think about the permies moderation policy as a kind of banana ban. Things might get deleted or disallowed that would work just fine in other places, but it doesn't work here. And that's great. I know I come here for a reason.

I have never really thought of myself as a gentle soul, but I am glad to say that permies is helping me move in that direction. I have been astonished by how the "be nice" rule can be such a productive guide in human interaction. Having come from generations of people who were conversational bludgeoners, it's been quite a change for me but unexpectedly positive. Basically, sharing opinions/perspectives in a friendly manner not only prolongs the conversation, but also increases the likelihood of further conversations, mutual give-and-take, or possibly even friendship. Permies has taught me how to enjoy the broadly colorful spectrum of opinions and perspectives in this community, while carefully manicuring those topics that could blacken that lovely panorama. Think of the wisdom and friendship that we might miss out on without the hard work of the moderation team. Long live Permies!

Brody Ekberg wrote:

Marie Abell wrote:
--laugh together. Find a funny movie or even just read the jokes thread here on permies--laughing is truly good medicine and I have seen it help with everything from stomach problems to depression.

Those are my thoughts! I wish all the best for you and your wife.

Also, we have been watching New Girl and The Good Place before bed. Both are comedies and we both enjoy them, but I’m skeptical because of the tvs bright lights. Maybe if we swapped comedies out for reading jokes or listening to something funny, that would work better for her.

LOL I used to watch New Girl with my sister. Funny stuff.

I think we can all agree that TV is bad in theory and in practice, but sometimes for the same active/distracted minds that tend to have problems with depression or insomnia, it can be just the thing. It keeps the eyes and the mind occupied enough with non-stressors that it enables one to relax enough to fall asleep. That's how it works for my insomniac, and sometimes for me too. I think the main problem with screens is the blue light, and as others have mentioned there are various solutions for that. I have heard good things about blublocker glasses (lots of youtubers give out discount codes for them, if you're willing to shop around). I will also say that I've been reading aloud to the kids lately, and that puts my sweetie to sleep like nothing else--so definitely another thing worth trying!
1 week ago
Brody, reading this from your perspective sounds in some ways like my interior dialogue over the past couple of years. My husband, for many complicated reasons, has had off and on insomnia and sleep troubles over the past 7 years, but especially for the past 2 years. I am a rather strict thinker on these matters, sometimes I almost echo my dad's constant maxim: "when the going gets tough, the tough get going". But that way of thinking, although it has helped me get through some rough times, isn't a great basis to build relationships.

A couple of things that I have learned from caring for my sweetie through his ups and downs:
-- caring for a sick spouse isn't as romantic as they make it seem on the movies. It is a drag. Don't expect yourself to think of it any other way--it isn't necessarily instinctive to sacrifice your time/goals/ideas to care for someone who is down, and sometimes you have to bite your tongue and help them the way THEY need to be helped, not the way that you think they need to be helped. We never fought ever until this health crisis happened...there are a lot of expectations and disappointments on both sides, but we have learned together that all of that just has to be put on hold until everything is a little better.
-- they probably blame themselves for how they feel. Just like you do, except they carry a double load of their self-blame plus your blaming them. Nobody could ever feel more depressed or guilty about their fucked-up health than they do, so they don't need you explaining to them all the ways they're doing it wrong. They don't need just one more explanation about just one more thing they could do to fix themselves.
-- statistically the single biggest positive factor in a recovery from illness or addiction is one close friend or family member (as a spouse you get to be both!) who loves and supports the person in recovery. I think that it has to do with the levels of frustration that they deal with, they just need someone who gives them the space and love to help take away that feeling of utter failure and despair. And that space can be the bit of relief they need that enables them to get out of their head and start looking towards changing the future.

All of that being said, these are the things that I've found that I can do that are really helpful to my husband during his difficult times:
--make healthy food accessible and positive, not another item on a list. Making roast beef with veggies or a batch of chicken soup doesn't involve that many minutes of work, but can make the next couple of days easier on you both.
--sharing time and good habits. Like others have mentioned, stretching together or rubbing/massaging her near bedtime can mean so much, and the physical and emotional benefits of loving touch are infinite.
--laugh together. Find a funny movie or even just read the jokes thread here on permies--laughing is truly good medicine and I have seen it help with everything from stomach problems to depression.
--IF she is up to it, get out and do something that you both like. Whatever your thing is, doesn't have to be healthy per se, just something that you both enjoy and will make her feel like a person instead of a problem.

Those are my thoughts! I wish all the best for you and your wife.
1 week ago
Gotcha. A world without clickbait would be a nicer place to live, that's for sure.

I watched your video (all the way to the end!) and I think you could make a great kids channel with this type of content. At least, whenever I'm trying to get paint to dry my kids can't seem to stay away 😁
3 weeks ago

r ranson wrote:
The big thing is to make sure i don't promise anything other than what is in the video.   Have to be totally truthful or youtube will be angry.

Yeah because I've never clicked on a youtube video that was something entirely different than what the thumbnail led me to believe it was. /sarcasm/

... I have nothing useful to contribute. Just wanted to point out youtube's hypocrisy here.
3 weeks ago